


A calm lake worth drowning for

by NoodlesAreGay



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders Has Panic Attacks, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders Angst, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders Angst, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Gen, Hurt, Hurt Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Hurt No Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Janus is the only good one pretty much, Logan can feel pain, Patton can feel pain, Poor Thomas Sanders, Remus is an asshole, Remus is kinda like a demon and less of a crackhead, Remus takes the opportunity, Roman sanders is an asshole, Sad Thomas Sanders, Self-Harm, Thomas wants a coping mechanism, Unsympathetic Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-07
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2021-03-04 22:55:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25124272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NoodlesAreGay/pseuds/NoodlesAreGay
Summary: The third side shows up, Remus. Remus is silent but smiling. He slides over to Thomas while Virgil and Janus are arguing. “Hey, Thomas”, Thomas is immediately uncomfortable and slightly shaking from the tone of voice Remus is using. Remus is normally loud and quite frankly has a high pitch compared to the other sides but right now Remus is so calm and quiet sitting in front of Thomas like a dog who got a treat. Remus smile widens. “ You don’t feel good? Poor baby! “ Remus says with no real feeling. Remus’s eyes crinkle from how hard he’s smiling. Teeth getting sharper while asking “ You want some help to feel better? “Or  Thomas messes up a huge project and is upset and does not know how to feel better. Remus shows up and offers a way to feel better.  The other sides deal with the consequences.
Kudos: 25





	A calm lake worth drowning for

**Author's Note:**

> This is based on me if the sides were like how my brain works. This is centered around self-harm and has no good ending. Please don't read this if you have self-harmed in the past because this might trigger you. This is purely a vent fic.

Thomas is at the end of his rope. He just completely ruined his project that is due in three days on accident and before he knows it he sobbing. Virgil is the first one there. “What if we never finish this? We have a deadline! This is terrible.” Thomas is just so tired that he can’t get/listen to the other sides. He looks down and listens to Virgil panicking. Janus shows up calmly “ Thomas calm down I’m sure they won’t care if it’s a few days late. ” Virgil then brings his attention to their conversation. “ I won’t forget what you are Deceit. We can’t trust shit when it comes to you. “ The third side shows up, Remus. Remus is silent but smiling. He slides over to Thomas while Virgil and Janus are arguing. “Hey, Thomas”, Thomas is immediately uncomfortable and slightly shaking from the tone of voice Remus is using. Remus is normally loud and quite frankly has a high pitch compared to the other sides but right now Remus is so calm and quiet sitting in front of Thomas like a dog who got a treat. Remus smile widens. “ You don’t feel good? Poor baby! “ Remus says with no real feeling. Remus’s eyes crinkle from how hard he’s smiling. Teeth getting sharper while asking “ You want some help to feel better? “ Thomas could not think straight. He could no longer see anything around Remus, could no longer hear anything but Remus. Thomas nodded slowly in response. “ Take your fingers and drag them along your forearms. “. “ Like this?” Thomas asked while lightly scraping his wrists and forearms. “ Yeah now go even harder “ Remus giggled. Thomas registered pain but it made him feel better. He went even harder seeing long red lines of his nail marks. “ See isn’t it pretty? “ Remus questioned. “ Yeah “ Thomas replied tears welling up because of the pain. “ Don’t you feel better? Remus asked softly as he softly rubbed on Thomas’s wrists. “ Yeah “ Thomas replied. “ Go harder “ Remus commanded. Thomas almost instantly dug his nails in so deep that he could tell his wrist was going to bleed soon. Thomas scratched harder HE wanted to see blood HE wanted to cry and feel the burn of tears in his wounds HE wante- “ WHAT ARE YOU DOING THOMAS “ The forth side was here, Patton. Thomas is quickly snapped out of whatever that was and finally looks down at his wrists and forearms and see what he did. The wrists, torn up skin breaking off and red, the pain hurts so much it hurts way more now that he stopped scratching. Thomas looks at Patton who is sobbing loudly and then looks for Remus. He is gone. Patton is now frantically screaming for Logan. The fifth and sixth side is here and quickly have a grasp on the situation. Roman makes a horrible sound like a dog getting his tail stomped on. Logan feels the fingernails rake against his flesh all at once and flinches. He stands frozen and is trying to process the situation and trying to understand how this happened to Thomas, their Thomas. Logan looks around to see Virgil and Janus. Virgil looks like he is going to vomit. Janus is the only one slightly composed and is slightly shaking fumbling with his gloves only looking at Thomas. Roman turns with fury in his eyes “ ANXIETY I FUCKING KNOW THIS WAS YOUR FAULT “ Virgil quickly makes eye contact with Roman and breaks it just as quickly afterward. Logan quickly comes to Virgil defense “ Roman we don’t know that “ he says trying not to cry from the pain. “ YOU ARE ON HIS SIDE? WE ALL KNOW HE HAD A HAND IN THIS. HE FUCKS UP THOMAS’S MOODS ALL THE TIME. “ Virgil’s mouth opens and closes, his tears now flowing freely. “ Logan has tears running down his face as well. The pain is so strong and the air is stagnant and he feels like he is going to suffocate. “ Please leave him alone “, Thomas asked sobbing. Roman takes a moment to look at every one of them. Thomas is crying hard while cradling his arms. Virgil is hyperventilating at this point and looking at the ground while smacking his hands against his head. Janus is trying to stop Virgil from hurting himself and is telling Virgil that it was his fault. Patton is crying and putting his hands over his ears trying to block out everything. Logan is softly crying and rubbing softly at his wrist not used to pain lasting this long. Roman quickly realizes he made things worse. “ Holy shit I’m so sorry Virgil. I did not mean it I swear “. Janus speaks for Virgil “ Don’t fucking think you can act like a prick and suddenly be sorry. “, Janus says sharply while calmly rubbing Virgil’s back trying to comfort the youngest. Remus is in the shadows looking happily at the chaos and knows Thomas will always come back to him. Thomas knew he felt better and he knew he was addicted to the feeling, to the pain, to the crying. He would go back to Remus and Remus would come back to him.

**Author's Note:**

> Please drink something. Please eat something. Watch something happy and know people love you. Please stay positive. We can get through this together. <3


End file.
